German

Once again I have been doing some soul searching and trying to figure out wtf I want to do with my life.

Hubby was brutual again in his assessment of my stupidly held views and i completely understand his point of view – but i just don’t know how to change them.

The issue is I believe – strongly and without doubt – that a person must have a career goal – (I blame my  mother for that :P)  and they must attain that goal.  Or they could have kids – which is a valid lifestyle choice and become stay at home mums for at least the first few years of the babies lives…again that is my opinion 🙂

However I fit neither of those boxes.  I have no career aspirations – other than the be making enough money to cover our bills and allow me to save for a god damn overseas holiday 🙂  I also have no current desire to procreate – that could of course change at any point.

So my “issue” is that I don’t fit into my own stereotype of what I should be – and it causes me so much mental stress.  Hubby was trying to convince me that I don’t need a goal – there are many people who don’t have goals or career aspirations and they do just fine.

So after that whole discussion, I realised that I was doing uni courses and things that don’t interest me – I don’t really want to do programming or marketting or business admin – but I was doing them because they inevitably lead to careers – that I don’t want to do.  I am going to look into getting back into German studies.

There are a couple of long term diploma’s etc, however I am going to look into some short courses as well see if i can’t get my German back a little faster than that.

I can certainly pick up a career that involves German easily enough and I love German and all things related so this will be a more positive move for me in the long run.

I also think the reason I am not getting a job is because I told myself I would work at Dad’s shop to give me the chance to a)study – having a day off and b) lose weight.  I think until I fulfil both of those things – I am nto going anywhere.  Sometimes Will power and sending things into the Aether is NOT a good idea unless you are sure you can still to it.