Too hard to think of a good title

I am still waiting to hear back from my last interview…they advised roughly 2 weeks before they would respond to people so this week marks 2 weeks since my interview.

I have been trying to remember to have my phone with me and not on silent in the hopes I get that phone call  or email soon.

Christmas is coming up and we have no solid plans as yet except we have to be home for Boxing day BBQ that happens every year at a friends place. Contemplating going to visit the father in law for Xmas weekend – still undecided and if we stay home hubby wants to go to the local botanical garden and have a picnic lunch if weather permits.  His mother will likely have to attend as well.  I have no idea if my mother and her muslim tribe are planning on doing anything – I do normally try and drag  my mother to whatever I am doing for Xmas as I don’t want her to spend it alone, but this year is her first with her tribe and I am not sure what the situation is…I am sure she will tell me in due course 🙂

I am feeliing ok about things mentally, but that is because I know I cannot control anything at the moment except how i feel.  So one day at a time is how I am taking it.

I was chatting to my little sister the other day who is trying to lose weight about the entire thing and she has given me some motivation to want to as well.  BUt honestly, the exhaustion from travelling so much is winning out.  My plan over the Xmas break I am having – the shop closes for a month – is to exercise for at least an hour 2 times a day.

If those people on “the biggest loser” can lose 10kgs a week by excercising all day for 3 months then I am going to give it a darn good attempt as well.  I have a bike and my workout room and I can walk etc as well…but I am hoping that after a solid month I will have started to develop the habit almost and it will be easier to just keep it going…espeiclaly if I have started to actually drop kilo’s.

Anywa, back to work I suppose hey?  It’s been really quiet at work this week. The phones have been dead since the storm on the weekend and they only work when being diverted.

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What a fucking shitty week…

Not for me, but for my friends in Sydney…There seems to be far too much hurt happening and there is nothing I can do about it to help them except offer support via email and phone etc.

One of my besties in Sydney let her mum just over 4 months ago, now her step dad has just passed as well due to cancer.  Her brothers have now lost both parents within such a short period and I just have no words to express my sorrow.

The painter at work lost his dad 6 months ago, and 2 weeks ago, lost his mum as well.  He also lost a brother last year.

Another friend in sydney lost her sister earlier this year and has just announced she and her husband of 12 years are separating due to differences. They have 2 children and she is moving back to her parents place in another state.

Another friend in Sydney has advised she s seeking fertility advice as she and her husband are having issues falling pregnant.

And to keep it going, another friend in Sydney has just lost his mother – 2 weeks ago and that is obviously still very fresh for him.

I lost someone this year that wasn’t overly close to me on a personal level, but on a religious level she meant a great deal to me as she was the introduction to the path I now follow.

These last few months have been horrible for all my friends and I just cannot understand how it can happen to so many people at once.  When summed up like this I just feel so completely horrible that I am not on the phone with them and attempting to make them feel better, but what do you say to someone who is dealing with this kind of raw emotional output.

I just wish I was closer to these people, both territorially and emotionally so the support I offer could be useful….

Treading water

I have done a few posts lately and then just not finished them or have kept them private – there is all together too much whinging, anger and emo in them.

I am feeling overall, positive about everything – but beneath it is the lurking suspicion that I am not really aware of reality.  I have my version of reality and everyone else is in another one.  I have to some how deal with this issue as it is causes problems in my own life.

I am still applying for jobs and harrassing the recruitment agencies I am listed with – of the 3 of them – I have made a phone call a week to the recruiter and have been lucky to get a return phone call in 2 weeks.  I am becoming increasingly assured that recruiters don’t actually do any work or that I am completely unemployable.  Since I know I can work, and have done in the past – I can only assume the first statement is therefore true.

Hubby is telling me to keep my chin up and that it will work out – he went through a bad unemployment spell before landing his current employer so he remembers how it feels.  It is just so disheartening to not even be given interviews – not even at agences either when I apply for jobs or ring them about sending my resume through….just complete silence even when I have been calling them.

It is hard.  So hard.  With the amount of jobs out there and the unemployment rate so low how can it be so hard to get a job?  I don’t think I will ever understand how they come up with figures that are so obviously distorted.

We have AWC in a couple of weeks, so a few days in Tassie might give me a little re-charge in batteries.  It will be nice to get away from everything here and not worry about things.  Hubby managed to get a two week break basically at the same time, he hasn’t had a proper long break in a very long time so it will be very good for him.

My plan to lose weight before my next birthday is not going anywhere – I have discovered though – I need to go to be by 10pm to be able to get up at 5am without too much issue….but it is the going to bed at 10 I am struggling with.  I just lose so much time travelling that I stay up later to feel that I have some semblence of time.

So this weekend I am going to try it out..I want to get up at 5.30 and see if I can do a good workout in 30 minutes therefore allowing me time to get through the shower and ready to leave by 6.30 at the absolute latest.  That’s my plan anyway 😀

I better run anyway, since I am at work – I am sure going to get a few phone calls etc so don’t have time to type 😀  BYE

Bah humbug

I haven’t really been writing much lately, because I just seem to have nothing worthwhile to say 🙂 The only really noteworthy thing that has happened is the bank stuffed up and sent our renewal visa debit card to our old address, someone nicked it out of the mailbox and then proceeded to use it:

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New bed and new me

We have now been sleeping on our bed for almost a week and my back is almost, almost not sore..there is still a slight twinge but it is nothing compared to what it used to be.  It took about 3 days for the pain to finally stop – after the first night there was a noticeable difference. So I am feeling so much better!!  My biggest issue with the bed is how high from the ground we are sleeping, at a guess it is almost triple the height of our old bed and I have to almost climb into it every night….I love it…except for nights like last night where hubby kept snuggling closer to me and at some point I was about to fall out….it’s a big drop…So comfy though…omg so comfy…new bed is super…love it – it’s probably my best buy of 2011….

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Update on my ear

Sorry for all the posting I am doing today/tonight.  I am just really not wanting to get off my new mac 🙂 HAHHAH

I had my post up follow up today for my ear, and the Dr said it is healing very well.  The only problem there is some sponge which has kind of stuck itself to my ear, so now that hehas most of th esponge out, I have to put about 5/6 drops into my ear, 3 times a day in the hopes it dissolves and loosens it better. Fingers crossed really.  Must remember to put some in shortly. Perhaps make a chai to go with it.

I also found out I have some of this sponge behind my ear drum, which will probably take about 3/4 weeks to completely dissolve and explains why I am still not able to hear very well.  I have to admit I can hear better since he took the majority of the sponge out, although I still have trouble if there is too much background noise…very annoying since there is always some sort of noise.

I also did some study tonight and hubby somehow managed to wade through all the crap on the dining table and completely clear it of everything on there. I am so very impressed.  It just means less work for me tomorrow.

I am running errand day tomorrow…I have to go to highpoint, then get the car checked for this ludicrous EPA fine thing, then make some phone calls which have to be during normal business hours of 9-5 (which is difficult at work due to the nature of the office) and then I have to get some groceries for our dinner guests etc and I just decided with a day like that I would just not go into work and take it as unpaid.

Hubby is sitting behind me looking up law degrees and I am so very proud of him for taking the step into investigating this. I really do hope he finds a degree/uni that is suitable. I would love to see him do something he wants to do as a career and not just something he fell into and happens to be good at. let’s face it, as I have said before, he is excellent at anything he does…it drives me mental sometimes, but it just means I have complete confidence in his ability to pick up something like law and make it a successful career. Could be very interesting times ahead if we are both studying degrees!! Imagine exam time…EEEEEK!

Tomorrow is one of my best friends mothers funerals.  I have not responded to her general status updates on fb and such as (and I could be very wrong) she is well aware there is nothing anyone can say that will make this easier for her.  However I know she is a write at heart and so to be updating at least gets it out there for her, whether people respond or not.  She knows we are here for her and she knows the extent to which any of us would go for her at the drop of a hat should she need anything.  I just don’t think it needs repeating and I certainly feel a little selfish for constantly repeating it to her.  Almost like I am saying it to make myself feel better about her feeling so awful….Not sure I explained that very well.  I know tomorrow is going to be truly horrible for her with everything she is going through and it is never nice to bury someone you love (on any level).

If you read this sweety, please just breathe and remember that she is no longer in that body but standing with you, as B will be. Draw on his strength, that’s why we have companions in life and love.

Anyway, I am going to make myself a chai and then sit down and fall asleep on the couch.  I am beat.