Day 18: Your views on gay marriage.

My views on gay marriage….

I don’t have any – to be honest…..I  would definitely be in the pro camp (no pun intended) however not because they are gay…but because they want to be married.

So, here we go…you shouldn’t have asked :p

You know it is not so long ago that interracial couples had trouble getting married and I am not entirely sure why that was an issue either, however this is not about race it is about what people choose to do behind closed doors or in public toilets…neither of which I care to know about.

They are in love and they should be allowed to show their community/friends that they have made that commitment to each other.

Now my biggest issue stems from the annoyance that people seem to think marriage equals something it isn’t.  According to Dictionary.com (and I know it is by no means the be all and end all…)

mar·riage

noun

1.

a.

the social institution under which a man and womanestablish their decision to live as husband and wife bylegal commitments, religious ceremonies, etc.Antonyms: separation.
b.

a similar institution involving partners of the samegender: gay marriage. Antonyms: separation.
2.

the state, condition, or relationship of being married;wedlock: a happy marriage. Synonyms: matrimony.Antonyms: single life, bachelorhood, spinsterhood,singleness; separation.
3.

the legal or religious ceremony that formalizes the decisionof two people to live as a married couple, including theaccompanying social festivities: to officiate at a marriage.Synonyms: nuptials, marriage ceremony, wedding.Antonyms: divorce, annulment.
4.

a relationship in which two people have pledged themselvesto each other in the manner of a husband and wife, withoutlegal sanction: trial marriage.

5.

any close or intimate association or union: the marriage ofwords and music in a hit song. Synonyms: blend, merger, unity,oneness; alliance, confederation. Antonyms: separation,division, disunion, schism.
Point 1 – states – SOCIAL!!!  a social institute  – so..basically society created the idea that it has to be a man and woman….so in theory socially speaking of course – we could change that to be whatever the hell we wanted..including a woman and her donkey, and man and his ferret or whatever we – as humans – wanted to make it.
Point 2 – I would say is a fairly new definition based on recent world events of allowing it in some parts of the world.
Point 3 and 4 – are the ones I like the most – to me – explain marriage and what it means for two people to undertake it.
With the current rate of divorce I think every single couple wanting to get married should be forced to live with their partner for at least 12 months and should also be made to sit a license test.  I have only been married for 6 years this coming April – so not very long I know, however my hubby and I have been living together as a married couple for 11 years in February – the rings we put on each others fingers did not change our feelings for each other or our circumstances.  Even so, 6 years seems to be longer than a fair few marriages these days and obviously very few people have taken the time to get to know their partners well enough before hand.
I still maintain – that you shouldn’t jump into marriage if you are not willing to work through the crap and make an effort – all relationships have bumps and difficulties and periods of absolute hell – at some point – however it is how you and your partner pull through it – this is true of any marriage – gay or not.
I have known of gay couples that have been together for over 20 years….infact one of my good friends has been with his boyfriend for almost as long as me and my hubby – so why should they not be allowed to formalise it if they wanted to?  The only thing that makes them gay is their sexual preference – and in most cases this does not affect the ability think with their heads, make decisions, work, enjoy art, cook, pay a mortgage, keep promises, love someone deeply, and it certainly should have no place in determining if someone is allowed to pledge themselves to another person legally.
Perhaps we should be preventing celebrities from getting married before preventing gay marriage.
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