Day 10: Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know

This one ties in nicely with Day 9, and who I didn’t want to let go.

Since D and I drifted apart, I have not ever filled the BFF slot in my life with another girl.  My hubby and I are best friends, as well as married, which is awesome – don’t get me wrong!, but there is something to be said for having a BFF that is so in tune with things you are interested in on almost every level.

The perfect example being that D would have come to the twilight movies with me instead of me forcing my hubby to come or go alone 😀  It would have been something for us to do together – something girly.  We could buy make up together or get facials or manicures etc…just girly things which are nice to do and would honestly bore my husband to tears or be followed with comments about not being a metrosexual!  LOL

I have never let another woman get close to the BFF territory with me since D, I always keep them at arms lengths – for safety – and it has always pained me that I am too scared to let anyone in.  That was until I met B.

Honestly, B and I connected (in my honest opinion) on a level that scared me. We had similar values, morals, thoughts on life and we just clicked, we were both in a bad place mentally when we met and we helped each through it and supported each other well.  I think you come out of something like that with a deeper relationship.

It all ended badly when I decided to stop being abused in a game and i decided to disband a guild I had created.  The specifics don’t matter – but it ended up being a massive issue with harsh words and emails being sent to each other.  We were on opposite sides of the fence and I think we still would be today if the same issue arose.

However it grates on me that our friendship ended because of that and I still wonder how she is, what she is up to and how her life is travelling along.  I really do wish I could just let her go as I was so hurt by the entire thing – as mentioned previously…I am too cautious now to want to build that friendship up, especially given my husband’s thoughts on what happened