Wow what a night!!
So we headed to our friends place at about 6:30 and I didnt stop drinking until 3:30am….so, far too many hours spent drinking…
I stayed on vodka all night to prevent any ill affects from mixing drinks. It was a bloody awesome night to be fair.
We caught up with some people that we hadn’t seen for a while and met some new people; I forgot how filthy some people can be when they get a little drink into them!!
We finally got to bed at about 4am and slept this morning until 10am….I felt very seedy and could barely manage movement this morning; which hubby was enjoying immensely – too many drinking jokes for my liking! Hubby drove home because I couldn’t….I am going to sleep really well tonight!
Such an easy answer for this one, I need to forgive myself for being such a jerk/asshat/bitch/mole/ etc etc.
I have spent a large portion of my life, being angry and upset with people for the wrong reasons – for not being able to admit I saw issues in myself. So I took it out on others.
I caused fights because I couldn’t admit I was hurting or wrong, because I expected more from people, because what I wanted to happen simply didn’t happen and because I knew – in my heart – I was angry at myself a lot of the time. I am not saying all the time and that some of the anger wasn’t justified, however a large portion wasn’t.
I need to let go of the guilt, feel the pain and then move past it. I do need to forgive myself for not being true to me and being a better person.