how crap am i?

how crap must i be that i can’t even get another job..is it that hard? more to the point – why don’t i have the confidence to aply for jobs that i know i can do with my eyes closed and my hands tied behind my back?

i will tell you why – because i have worked here for so long and been put down so often here that i have no confidence in my abilities….i am so worried that i am unable to do anything – maybe i am not as good as i think i am…but i know that isn’t true because all i need to do is look at how much work i get through each day and i know i am good at it…

so then why do i think i will never get the jobs i apply for……

iam considering doing a tafe course in administration and ask for credit as prioir learning due to workplace experience etc…just to say i havea qualification – i know it is a crappy course to do but it will gimme something on my resume and something in my brain i suppose…so i think i should do it…

then once i have started losing weight i am sure my confidence will pick up again as well..which would be very useful obviosuly…

i am sick of being treated like shite from this place and never getting apay rise says to me i am crap – never mind the people who do jack shit all day and get bonus’ and pay rise…grrr

anyway just wanted to get that out of my system…

bye

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